It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

Wait - I think I'm a couple months early. C'est la vie. It IS, however, that time of year when students everywhere are experiencing emotional and psycological roller-coasters as finals creep upon us. So why is it that I am spending precious study time blogging? Simply put, I'm not so worried.

WHAT?!?
Not worried about finals, you say? That's PREPOSTEROUS!

I know this. I also know that I would go into seclusion if my perfect GPA was tainted by laziness. However, this will not be the case.

The difference? I'm prepared.
I have friends who love me.
I have a family who loves me.
I have a LORD who loves me.

If my God is for me, who (what finals) can be against me?

I'm taking the time to fully digest and understand the material. I'm discussing and internalizing every bit of information on which I can get my hands. I'm trying to get more sleep. What more to do? Why worry?

Sure, this time next week I'll likely be hyperventilating as I prepare for my two-hour math final (that's right), but I know that I'm not in ultimate control. That's up to God. He's comforted me so that I can know His plan for me. I can do all things - even ace ridiculous finals - through Christ who strengthens me.

Now, instead of stress, I feel excitement. I cannot wait for each of my finals to meet its match. In Christ, I am bigger, stronger, and smarter than they are. Here goes nothing.

Bring it, Green Books.
Bring it, Scantrons.
Bring it.
I'm ready for you.

Sometimes you think, only to discover.

Sometimes you think life is going one way, only to discover that it's actually heading in the opposite direction.

Sometimes you think you have someone figured out, only to discover that he's an entirely different person.

Sometimes you think everything's going your way, only to discover that the world's collapsing around you.

Sometimes you think you know what's up, only to discover that you have absolutely no idea.

Sometimes you think the sun is up and the sky is blue, only to discover that your eyes are closed.

Sometimes you think life gives you lemons, only to discover that God gives you lemons. And limes.

Sometimes you think your heart's stopped beating, only to discover that it's just started.

Sometimes you think it's the end of the world, only to discover that you have no control over it anyway.

Sometimes you think you're on key, only to discover that you're singing the wrong song.

Sometimes you think life is easy, only to discover that easy is a word only applicable to sewing and math.

Sometimes you think you're all alone, only to discover that you're surrounded.

Sometimes you think God is crazy, only to discover that YOU are crazy.

Sometimes you think words are pointless, only to discover that they are pivotal.

Sometimes you think love is easy, only to discover that nothing could be further from the truth.

Sometimes you think all hope is lost, only to discover that it's just waiting to be found.

Sometimes you think, only to discover.

Man in Light of God's Grace

I wrote this whilst feeling quite sick and writing two papers. Go figure.

In attempting to be every man's friend, he indeed becomes no man's friend.

In wanting fame, he is humbled.

In reaching out, he finds he wants to retreat.

In always looking on the bright side, he is driven to depression.

In being surrounded, he is alone.

In living, he dies.

But God...

... in being despised by many, loves all.

... in humility, is the most famous man of all time.

... in our retreat, seeks us out.

... in His darkest day, did the most good.

... in the midst of our loneliness, surrounds us.

... in our death, brings us to life with Him.

So be it.

Alleluia! Come, Lord Jesus.

- News Flash -

Life has been crazy.
I love the theatre.



Someday I'll have time to actually write something here.

That's all.

Until then....

Wonder what it's like with Red Bull.....

As you may have observed, it is very late..... or rather, very early.

I am finding sleep elusive, and thought writing might help.

This doesn't seem to be so. C'est la vie.

Anyway, restlessness has gripped me for a variety of reasons, but one of the happier, larger ones is the fact that my -- uh, seminarian intern/acting youth pastor/hero -- is FINALLY returning to Southern California this week!!! He has been gone for over two months -- two months! -- and is coming home tomorrow -- today (??? : time is beyond me at the moment). We are very excited (by 'we', I do not refer simply to the voices, but also to real people: the youth group).

Reminding myself of why he was away has been quite helpful. I'm very happy that he went -- he was doing the Lord's work in South America, working with churches, orphanages, schools, villages, etc. and sharing the Gospel. It is selfish to wish him back, considering all that wonderful things that happen down there. However, sometimes it feels unavoidable. Sigh.

Looking at the pictures and hearing the stories, the happenings in Argentina and Peru are truly amazing. Churches are being formed, people are being saved, hope is being spread, and lives devoted to Jesus are being built. It is when I think of these everyday, incredible miracles, that I am given a new hope -- a hope in Christ.

Hope. Such a fantastic word.

As college looms ahead, I am thrilled by the vastness of opportunities to spread the Good News, but also fixated and frustrated by the challenges of doing so. It is a seemingly simple thing, a joyous celebration of Christ's gift, and yet there seems to be a growing difficulty for Christians to be listened to/agreed with in certain college situations.

Another issue is finding a calling. What if you enjoy many areas of study? If you find multiple doors open, which do you choose? Ack!!

As these thoughts grow more stressful, I am ever reminded of what God has told us, and am grateful -- though I cannot help feeling a bit stupid for forgetting.

I feel so human, and Jesus' holiness is, thankfully, not discouraging by any means, but comforting and hopeful. If we simply put all of our trust in Him, He will give us the strength we need to carry out His will.

And it hits me: when we truly surrender, it is then that we are truly free.

Free from worry, from burdens placed on us by others or by ourselves. Free from sin. Free from all the problems of this world. When we surrender our lives to the Redeemer, He gives it more abundantly, and opens up great expanses of ways to live for Him -- there is no hesitation in sharing the Gospel, in carrying out the teachings of Jesus.

We must die to the world in order to live for God.

What a wonderful life!!

Learning to let go,

Ari

This past weekend, I went on a retreat called AYM (Anglican Youth Ministries) High. It was a very emotional and inspiring weekend that helped me to grow in my relationship with Christ. I saw the Lord do some absolutely amazing things over those couple of days. Something, though, has been repeating in my head. They are poignant words, and were part of the weekend that changed how I view things. They are lyrics from a Jars of Clay song, and I would like to share them with you.

I am the only one to blame for this

Somehow it all adds up the same

Soaring on the wings of selfish pride

I flew too high and like Icarus I collide

With a world I try so hard to leave behind

To rid myself of all but love, To give and die
To turn away and not become

Another nail to pierce the skin of one who loves

More deeply than the oceans,

More abundant than the tear

Of a world embracing every heartache
Can I be the one to sacrifice

Or grip the spear and watch the blood and water flow

To love you - take my world apart

To need you - I am on my knees

To love you - take my world apart

To need you - broken on my knees

All said and done I stand alone

Amongst remains of a life I should not own

It takes all I am to believe

In the mercy that covers me
Did you really have to die for me?

All I am for all you are

Because what I need and what I believe are worlds apart
And I pray,

To love you - take my world apart

To need you - I am on my knees

To love you - take my world apart

To need you - broken on my knees

I look beyond the empty cross

Forgetting what my life has cost

And wipe away the crimson stains

And dull the nails that still remains

More and more I need you now,

I owe you more each passing hour

The battle between grace and pride

I gave up not so long ago

So steal my heart and take the pain

And wash the feet and cleanse my pride

Take the selfish, take the weak,

And all the things I cannot hide

Take the beauty, take my tears

The sin and soaked heart and make it yours

Take my world all apart

Take it now, take it now

And serve the ones that I despise

Speak the words I can't deny

Watch the world I used to love

Fall to dust and thrown away

I look beyond the empty cross

Forgetting what my life has cost

So wipe away the crimson stains

And dull the nails that still remain

So steal my heart and take the pain

Take the selfish, take the weak

And all the things I cannot hide

Take the beauty, take my tears

Take my world apart, take my world apart

I pray, I pray, I pray

Take my world apart

Worlds Apart.

Hello world!

Well, it seems that I have somehow managed to set up this blogthingamabob. So, here it is! I am quite excited to add my ramblings to the seemingly never-ending stream of words here on the information super highway. We shall see how this goes....

Oh, I do love the April weather; what beauty God has bestowed!

Peace,

Ariana