Wonder what it's like with Red Bull.....

As you may have observed, it is very late..... or rather, very early.

I am finding sleep elusive, and thought writing might help.

This doesn't seem to be so. C'est la vie.

Anyway, restlessness has gripped me for a variety of reasons, but one of the happier, larger ones is the fact that my -- uh, seminarian intern/acting youth pastor/hero -- is FINALLY returning to Southern California this week!!! He has been gone for over two months -- two months! -- and is coming home tomorrow -- today (??? : time is beyond me at the moment). We are very excited (by 'we', I do not refer simply to the voices, but also to real people: the youth group).

Reminding myself of why he was away has been quite helpful. I'm very happy that he went -- he was doing the Lord's work in South America, working with churches, orphanages, schools, villages, etc. and sharing the Gospel. It is selfish to wish him back, considering all that wonderful things that happen down there. However, sometimes it feels unavoidable. Sigh.

Looking at the pictures and hearing the stories, the happenings in Argentina and Peru are truly amazing. Churches are being formed, people are being saved, hope is being spread, and lives devoted to Jesus are being built. It is when I think of these everyday, incredible miracles, that I am given a new hope -- a hope in Christ.

Hope. Such a fantastic word.

As college looms ahead, I am thrilled by the vastness of opportunities to spread the Good News, but also fixated and frustrated by the challenges of doing so. It is a seemingly simple thing, a joyous celebration of Christ's gift, and yet there seems to be a growing difficulty for Christians to be listened to/agreed with in certain college situations.

Another issue is finding a calling. What if you enjoy many areas of study? If you find multiple doors open, which do you choose? Ack!!

As these thoughts grow more stressful, I am ever reminded of what God has told us, and am grateful -- though I cannot help feeling a bit stupid for forgetting.

I feel so human, and Jesus' holiness is, thankfully, not discouraging by any means, but comforting and hopeful. If we simply put all of our trust in Him, He will give us the strength we need to carry out His will.

And it hits me: when we truly surrender, it is then that we are truly free.

Free from worry, from burdens placed on us by others or by ourselves. Free from sin. Free from all the problems of this world. When we surrender our lives to the Redeemer, He gives it more abundantly, and opens up great expanses of ways to live for Him -- there is no hesitation in sharing the Gospel, in carrying out the teachings of Jesus.

We must die to the world in order to live for God.

What a wonderful life!!

Learning to let go,

Ari